Danger, Theirs A Roadblock, Dead Ahead 

(Boz Scaggs Song)

Customers and employees, are losing it, big time. One co-worker, just this week, "threw me under the bus." (I am a great fan of idioms. Chris and I, sometimes, make up our own. My favorite one of Chris's, is this one: "They will likely have a cow, a canary, and several other farm animals.")

This being "thrown under the bus," was done metaphorically, of course. I have about three co-workers that I can trust with confidences, right now; those whom I know, will not to be two-faced. Two are my very close friends, Chris, and Tina. Both of them, like to say to me, that they have always, have had my back, as well as, my front, etc.  We are all close in age, and have the same sense of humor.

Anyhow, the Loose-Cannon co-worker, as before mentioned, in the last blog entry, is currently, being accused, by the Nine-Year-old Mentality, challenged, co-worker, of being a witch. (The spell and broomstick kind). They live in the same building. The Loose Cannon has physical restrictions also, and is in a lot of pain. The Nine-Year-Old Mentality, should not work at a register; she thinks the estimated cost of a 20 0z soda, is $6.00. I have had to save her from making a few huge mistakes.

You never know what drama will unfold at my place of employment. The loose-cannon co-worker goes into a sort of trance-like mode, when she is angry. She blurts out terrible things, and comes close to losing her job. When she calms down, (I often have to hear all about her issues, that she has, with everyone), she forgets, she even said them, when it is brought up to her, again, later. 

Maybe that is why the Nine-Year-Old Mentality thinks she is a witch, and casting spells on her.  But apparently, this challenged co-worker, also found some sort of animal claw, under her door? What is this, an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?

After the Loose Cannon calms down, at whoever she was mad at, that person, is now, suddenly, her best friend; with a new nickname. For example, she calls one co-worker, "My Work Husband." 

The people she yells at, they do not forget. This bizarrely-behaved, employee, has previously, referred to me, as, "Her Holly," and has done so, since her first days, on the job. She calls another co-worker, her, "Sister, From Another Mother." She has only worked for us, just a few months, but assumes tight-ties, trust, and instant family-type, friendship, with our personal family members, whom she barely knows. 

This emotional woman, is not only physically challenged, and paranoid, and but wants constant emotional feedback, for everything she does. She gets gets mad, about everything, feeling she has been targeted, and slighted on purpose; about things that do not even have to do with her. She is wearing us all out. 

She is angry about not getting feedback, but Chris and I have been trying to teach her everything we know. Her personality can change in an instant. Half of our staff, seem to suffer with some sort of bi-polar disorder. This can get very  confusing and stressful!

There is no way to get through to the Loose Cannon, about her problems, in a way, that will not make it worse, or that would cause her able to change her behavior. In the meantime, she is driving us all crazy. She has no idea why anyone gets frustrated with her. Predinsone is making me very crabby enough, as it is! 

The employee lost it, on the assistant manager, Mr. N., on Sunday, regarding his demanding she come into work, in the snowstorm, when she had no money for a taxi, and was snowed-in. That part, I understand, as he did that to me, once, before, too. But she continued to shoot cannon balls, of other various subjects, at him, that day, with great force, and would not let him get away. This manager is fairly reasonable, if you explain problems to him, calmly. But she was not calm. When she finally, looses it, again; this time on a customer, the end might be swift. 

This explosion with my assistant manager, was the occasion, where she "threw me under the bus," because I get more hours than her. I have worked at Walgreen's for almost nine years; and my boss Mrs.W., knows, I need the money, and the insurance, desperately. 

This confused employee, has for some time, claimed to care about me, while all the while, she was really, after my hours; and is currently, also angry, at a new hire, because she feels she should have their hours, as well. She switches back and forth, in a black and white personality disorder, and really, does not remember, what she said, an hour, or two days ago. It is like the Billy Joel song, "Why Do I Go to Extremes?" This new hire, who the Loose Cannon had a grudge against, has now mysteriously, disappeared!

The other day, at work, I was sure it was a full moon, and I actually went out to check. This couple, had come to cosmetics, to ring up some product. The lady was a white, middle-aged woman, who is always kind of flighty, in a hippie-sort-of-way, but nice. She was with a black guy, who had a real attitude problem. He started to demand that he be given bags, so he could bag his own product. Then he wanted everything, double-bagged.

 I made a comment about the dishwasher soap being heavy, and he came back, with the following: "I know that. I was in the military. We are not thieves." Seriously, this is what he said. Chris and I looked at each other in confusion, as he walked away. My search for the full moon, was unsuccessful, due to cloud cover. It did not turn out to be a full moon, when I later, checked the calendar, but some of us currently fear, (all in fun), that the planets are misaligned this week, due to how everyone is behaving.

When I told my team leader, Jodi, about this odd customer's comments, she could not stop laughing, and responded with, "Way to out yourself, Dude, why else would you bring up stealing, for no reason?"

There is a creepy song, that often comes on at work, when strange things are happening, in the store. Chris and I are not superstitious, but this song, "Lunatic Fringe," by Red Rider, will come on, while registers are shutting down on their own, or when we are feeling, otherwise, stressed, for other reasons. 

Chris and I tried in vain, for a couple months, to discover the artist, and the title, for this song, while asking others, for help. No one seemed to know it, or so we thought. I finally looked up the song, on the Internet, by the haunting, European ambulance sirens, in the background. I came up with, "Lunatic Fringe," by Red Rider. I will not share any of the lyrics, as I do not want it stuck in my head, again!

Anyhow, I texted this urgent information, to Chris, that evening, that I had actually found it; and then, both of us, in our own homes, turned on a version of it, from You-Tube. Both our husbands, at the same time, then said, to each of us, "Oh, that song!!" A song, apparently, over-played in the 80's, which the women in this story, somehow, missed completely. A song, we now promptly, turn off, if it shows up in our home, via any Pandora-type, music programs.

In other news, my mom entertained me, and half the Walgreen's staff, the other day, by telling me, that for just $25.00, a San Francisco Zoo, will name a Hissing Cockroach, after your ex, for Valentine's Day. They will do this, so that you can emotionally let go, and go on, strong. 

Hissing cockroaches are about the size of a small cat, and they hiss, but not with their mouths. They are disgusting, and everyone can relate this beast, to an ex, (in my case, it would be Randy), that fits that description, completely.

One day, several years ago, when working with kids, I was asking all of them, their favorite animal, to keep them busy, while we prepared to go outside. I got the usual responses, such as cat, dog, and horse. 

Cameron Cleaveland, however, a very smart first-grader, with very kind, and intelligent parents, responded right away, with, "Hissing Cockroach, from Madagascar." It was a moment, I never forgot; so this zoo story, brought up more funny memories. This was at least 15 years ago, before, the Madagascar movies became popular.

 Last night, Dave came to pick me up at work, and then we did a little shopping there, before heading home. We walked up to the register, and my co-worker began to ring things up. Suddenly, in the middle of the transaction, the scanner stopped working, completely. We had to stop, and drag all our stuff, to another register. 

I told my husband, and Mr. N., that I blamed Boz Scaggs, for this strange situation. I had been "rocking out," to his song, "Danger, Theirs A Breakdown, Dead Ahead," a few minutes, earlier. I guess, there really was, a break-down, dead ahead!

Last, but not least, I must mention a displayer, which we have hanging  up, on a side panel at Walgreens', in cosmetics, with inexpensive make-up, by Wet and Wild. The displayer shows the very made-up  face, of a famous model. The promotion on the box, is what is interesting, as it was not well-thought out. 

It clearly states, "Find out how to steal this look, in three easy steps." I pointed this out to my bosses, who found it hilarious. If Jay Leno still did his funny headlines, on Mondays, I would send him a picture, of this displayer. He would love it.

Stay tuned, for more entertaining stories, from the Wacky World of Walgreen's.